For those of you who live under a rock, you may never have heard of all the crazy Old Wive's Tales that are frequently associated with being pregnant. According to a lot of these, I'm having a boy (wait a minute...) but according to at least 50% of them, I'm also having a girl. So I don't put a whole lot of stock in them.
However, day after day, year after year, generation after generation these OWTs are passed along as though they are sacred words to follow. Yeah, Ok. I don't buy it. In fact, I think that the more you research the effects of said WTs you will realize that they aren't all that effective or even safe.
In particular I'm referring to the ones that they say will induce labor. Let's think about that for a second. I know that by the time we've been incubating for 8.75 months, we're desperate. Those last three weeks seem to last the longest, as well as prove to be the hardest. Not only are you faced with the fact that you will very soon holding that little bundle of joy, you also are faced with the alleviation of all the pain, pressure, and problems that come with being 9 months pregnant. I'll be the first to admit that right now, walking feels like I'm climbing a mountain. My back hurts in a way that it hasn't for...well, since the last time I was this pregnant. I can't eat half the foods I love, which I hate, because I have the Worst Heartburn Known To Man.
That being said, I'm not ready to jump on up and drink some Castor Oil.
So for this delightful post, I'm going to pro/con (most likely with the "pro") all those lovely OWT Labor Inducing Methods.
Castor Oil: Not to be confused with Castro Oil, which is actually for your car! Take note ladies, Castor oil is a laxative. It gets ya moving! Which is great, if you aren't nine months pregnant, and already on the toilet 24/7. Most likely what will happen if you try to ingest this, is it will upset your stomach. By "upset" I mean you will probably have diarrhea and dehydration, along with the embarrassment of telling your doctor that you were desperate to push a baby out, when in reality you're just gonna push out some bowel movements.
Spicy Foods: Safer than castor oil, but essentially the same concept. It's gonna give you a bubble gut, and you're probably just going to end up on the toilet. And seriously, would you want to be your doctor if you should go into labor while you're also passing gas and potentially suffering from diarrhea? Show some respect ladies.
Nipple stimulation: Ok, so here's the nitty gritty of this one. There is a reason that nursing moms tend to lose weight faster. It's because the act of having your nipples stimulated causes your uterus to contract back to it's regular size faster. Now, going off that logic, Yes, it would also start labor contractions. However, do you realize how long you'd have to do that in order for the contractions to actually be effective and long term? If you've got the time to sit and play with yourself for hours, go ahead. I'll be chillaxing pain free til I'm actually using my bits to feed a baby.
Sex: Ok, so there's two reasons this "works" 1. Sperm softens your cervix. 2. An orgasm can cause contractions. So. If, at 9 months pregnant, you are feeling confident in your physical capability to do the deed, have fun. Prepare yourself for the reality that in the end, you're probably just going to want to cry cause it's so hard to move around. But, if you can make it happen, this is one of the more "effective" ways of inducing labor. Just saying. Not to mention, as a plus, it's probably the last time you'll actually want/be able to partake in this activity for awhile.
Walking/Exercise: Supposedly this is supposed to prepare all those muscles, and entice baby to move on down and get ready. Yeah, not sure how, considering you can't really walk at a brisk pace if baby is already "head down and in position" It's like trying to walk while holding a bowling ball between your legs. Not very easy, and not very enjoyable. I prefer the "lay on the couch and pretend you're motivated enough to move" method. Of course, the upside of walking is that for the first time in what (in my case) is probably months, you'll be up and moving around which might be refreshing.
A bumpy car ride/four wheeler: Ok, I get the theory behind this. Bump that baby down! However, I'm not full term yet, and I can't STAND being jarred around in the car. If Husband even Thinks about braking too hard, I'm all over him like white on rice. But if you want to feel like you were punched in the whoo-ha, go right on ahead.
Yoga Ball- Now this is a new one to me. But I've been hearing some women talk about how sitting on a yoga ball and swaying your hips, or bouncing slightly also helps get baby in position. Now, I haven't tried this, but it seems a lot more comfortable than walking up a steep hill considering it's supposed to do the same thing. The plus side to a yoga ball? If you've still got the coordination to stay on one, you're a lucky lady. :)
Membrane stripping: This one should be performed by a medical professional only. Preferably the one who actually knows about your pregnancy. ;)
Anyway. Those are just a handful of the most common ways women try to bring on baby. Do I think they work? Nope, not really, unless you are lucky enough to try them when your body just happens to be ready to go into labor anyway. If body ain't ready, baby ain't ready.
I'm sure in 2.5 weeks I'll be reminding myself of this little tidbit of advice. But personally, with this baby, I'm fine if he stays in there as long as possible. I'm in no hurry to evict him, no matter how uncomfortable I am. Because the best thing for baby is to cook as long as possible. 37 weeks may be considered full term, but did you know that even some 37 week babies have to have a trip to the NICU? You'll spend the rest of your life thinking about your tiny human. Might as well start now.
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