How do I love you? Let me count the ways.

Far away and long ago there was a time when women were seen, and not heard. They had no rights unless their husband gave them. The sole purpose of a woman was to be a good wife, and a good mother. Keep the house clean, raise the children, and keep their husbands happy.

That was long, Long, LONG ago. Maybe not so far off when you look at a timeline, but most definitely an alternate reality in which most of us live these days. In fact, the more time passes the more the roles of men and women shift. Men are staying at home with the kiddos while the women are ruling over the high powered job fields. While this is perfectly ok, and certainly works for some families, Husband told me long ago that if I didn't want to work, I would not have to. So I don't. This seems to be the best fit for our family, and I enjoy (ok, I tolerate) the day in and day out of keeping up with our house. 

However, it has taken me quite some time to adjust my attitude about being at home. To realize that just because Husband leaves every day to go to work does not mean he's off having a jolly 'ole time while I sit at home trapped with our children. More often than not I would find myself (and sometimes still do) being resentful of the ability to just get up and go, no strings attached, and leave the house each day. I would stew, frequently getting more and more irritated as the day passed at the fact that he got to go to work instead of being home breaking up fights and wiping baby butts all day long. The more irritated I became, the more I would find myself taking out my frustration on the one person who had given me what I wanted. Husband.

Now, this is where things get real personal, real quick. Because if there is one thing that women are guilty of, myself included, it is becoming an Emasculating Biotch with no self control. I have rid myself of a lot of these nasty habits over the course of the last five years, but the list of things I would do included the following:

*Vent to my family about Husband.

*Vent to HUSBAND'S family about Husband (big no-no friends, Big No-No)

*Nitpick at every single thing Husband did from the time he came home to the time we went to bed.

*Pout very obviously in front of whomever we were spending our time with, and then when asked what was wrong very pointedly direct a look at Husband, while saying in a tone that almost dripped with acid that "Nothing is wrong."

*Focus on the things about Husband that irritated me.

*Refuse to see the good in the things that he would do for me.

*Never say thank you to Husband for the things that he would do for me.

*Literally NEVER apologize even when I was in the wrong, but expected it from Husband.

*Could not in any way, shape, fashion or form see that Husband just viewed things different than I did. He was wrong, I was right, nothing could change my mind about it.

*Follow a fight

*Start fights

*Make Husband finish fights.

Now I could probably keep going, but I would hate for you to focus on the "old me" too much, because then you might forget how charming I am now. Many of these things were a habit early on in our marriage.

But I digress. Back to women being guilty of emasculating their husbands. I know, obviously, that is hard when you first marry a person and then life hits you in the face, to always be the person your spouse married. I have changed in many, Many ways in the last five years. Now, instead of doing the things on the list above, I try to focus on other things. This is not always easy, and I still from time to time do every single thing on this list at some point or another. I am human. Habits are hard to break. But every single day I make it a point to take note when I do one of these things, and try to counteract it with a positive and uplifting action. IF I catch myself talking negatively about Husband (which is rare these days, because the man is damn near perfect) I stop myself, apologize to the person I was speaking to, and remind not only myself but them as well of how good he is. Because you never want to leave a person with a negative thought being the last thing they hear you say about your significant other. Not only is that detrimental to your own relationship, it is detrimental to THEIR relationship. And really, do you want that to come back and bite you in the ass?

So what I'm saying here ladies, is that we have to be the women our husbands fell in love with. We have to remember every day that he is the man we fell for. Every day we have to strive harder and harder to put him up instead of down. I suck at this almost every day. Seriously, ask Husband, he'll tell you a lighthearted joke about how I really am an Ice Queen. (I know, it's hard to believe, but really I lack a lot of positive emotions) But I am trying. So to end this delightful post about how we Do Not Hate on Husbands here is a list of all the things that I love about my man.

He makes me laugh.

He looks nerdy in his glasses and I think it's Hawt.

He has incredibly shmexy arms. (Muscles are yummy)

He is an amazing Daddy.

He looks adorable curled up with the baby in his arms.

He cooks meals at least twice a week.

He gives me my "me time" at minimum every other day.

He gets better and better every day at not grumbling when I ask him not to play video games.

He watches t.v. shows that I like, with me, and never skips ahead without me. (Yeah, I'm totes guilty of that one)

He treats his family (mom, dad, sisters and so on) with respect and love. (You know what they say, if he treats his mama good, he'll treat you good)

He works his ass off to provide for us.

He reminds me to treat myself every now and again.

He puts his wants last.

He indulges my scattered compulsions to undertake new hobbies.

He kisses me goodnight EVERY night.

He kisses me goodbye before he leaves for work.

ok...he kisses me ;)